What if I hear a voice and tell no one? My personality will fragment because of the “secret,” leading to internal conflict and confusion. So what does it mean to hear a voice? To the outside world, you may appear confused, but there is more beneath the surface. When we learn to speak, there comes a moment when the child learns to properly use the word “I” in their speech. This milestone does not mean that their self-image aligns with how others perceive them.
Have you ever noticed that you can always find flaws when you look at yourself in the mirror? Unless you are a pure narcissist, seeing only what you want to see, most people think of themselves a bit more positively than they actually are. Conversely, if you are severely depressed, you probably feel bad about yourself. Now, when you look into the mirror with compassion, as if you were talking to someone you care deeply about, you might notice expressions on your face that draw your attention. What would you do if you wanted to make that other face happy? This might sound unusual, but approaching yourself with compassion can actually reduce wrinkles!
So the child has learned to say “I” instead of its name, and we think it knows itself. They have become an individual. However, when you examine yourself carefully, you may notice that you are, in fact, many. You are imitating bits and pieces of what you learned from others. Even your speech is borrowed, as we did not invent language ourselves. We learn to say “I” from others who say “I” in a particular context. Try to remember or imagine how you came to know when to use the word “I” for yourself. You might think about all the people influencing you. Even now, while you read this, you are comparing me to yourself, trying to figure out if I belong to your group or not. Is there something odd about me? When I use the word “I,” you look at me curiously and try to deduce from the context who I am.
I do not know if this is so in every language, but at least in English, the sound of the word “I” resembles the word “eye.” Help! Does this mean that I see with my eyes what you see through yours? How can I even begin to imagine what it is like to be you? When you are psychotic, the self defragments. You have to learn to live again. In the schizophrenic condition, you are back to square one. Everything deteriorates. You lose your capability to plan, and your sense of self breaks down. This can happen very gradually, but it may start with hearing a voice…
The voice is your new self calling for your attention. These kinds of problems often start in the early twenties, when young people begin building the foundation for their future careers, which will carry them on while living independently from the nurturing nest of family. It is a new self emerging. Here, spiritual and religious aspects of the surrounding culture play an important role. Religion is the culture of your community. It tells the story of becoming a valuable member of society, which is how it functions practically. The religious narrative structures how we learn to think about ourselves in the world. In religion and spirituality, people hear voices all the time. They get called to God, which means everything gets meaning.
This is the secret. When we speak of God, that is an initiation ritual. You cannot understand God until you find God inside yourself, and at the same time, you have to learn to obey some rules. Schizophrenia is curable by curing society. The voices reflect perceptions. They speak of what should be done. Nobody likes to look into the mirror. We blend out what frightens us. Let the schizophrenic speak about “us.” Let them use the word “we” or their name. Give them a new name. Negotiate. How would you like to be, and how do we get there? As you think, so you become.
This can be an angry child, a sad child, or simply a naive child, and you also do not have all the answers. You look through the eyes of the schizophrenic, like you look at yourself in the mirror. You see all your flaws. No wonder it is so hard to talk to us! Why would we believe you? Our consciousness is perfect, were there not these forces… Shivashaktiatmakam Brahma, knowing and doing are one in consciousness. There is no “I” in God. You cannot expect the schizophrenic to think about themselves the way you do. You are in the cult of normal people. You need to be saved, but I am not ready yet. I need to finish studying, spend a month in the desert, live alone like a hermit, until I got all of this sorted out. The little child on the arm of the Madonna, but now you are 21!
Solution. You have to be able to keep the secret. Love is all there is. Everybody knows that, but so often forgets to remember. How does a world look like where love is all there is? That is almost an ideological question. Thus, we need to examine the contextual fabric of the internalized “I.” This body needs to be healthy, and we need a plan. The plan is always in relation to someone. You must help me to become who I am, God of my own thoughts and actions, master over my life. I want to be happy.
Just listen to the voices while sitting in deep meditation. The same force that guides the stars guides you too. Try a subjective approach through objective adjustment, and if you are a therapist, listen with two ears, for they hear more than one.
Witzenhausen, 23. Mai 2024
O Man of Two Visions! Close one eye and open the other. Close one to the world and all that is therein, and open the other to the hallowed beauty of the Beloved.
Bahá’u’lláh
The Hidden Words, Persian 12